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THE SUNDAY LIGHT SUNDAY, MAY 24, 1896 # SHORT SNAPPERS. Well, well, well! Another policeman has opened a saloon. Truth may be crushed for a time, but will finally "get there." The mechanical editor makes the average reader feel very tired. The average Sunday paper is in demand by the old junk dealers. Professional healers generally take good care to "heel" themselves. The statute of limitation has run against the wreckers of the "busted Maverick bank." An old San Antonio toper says: "Our city beer is laden with cooling consolation." "A good cigar is one that it is a pleasure to receive; a bad one, a pleasure to give away." Some editors endeavor to be so extremely "conservative" as to -appear positively silly. Can one in a hundred of the Big Chief's Indians tell who is president of the United States? With the Indian aliens knocked out the A. P. A. will not leave a grease spot of the Big Chief. The poor duped depositors would be pleased to hear from the trustee of the "busted Maverick bank." Frank's Gossip is running a competitive race with the Fad. He will have to call on Aunt Ruth to help out. The less a man knows about the money question the more anxious you will find him ready to discuss free silver. The evil-doer has no fear of the law, if he can only stand in with the officer whose duty it is to enforce it. The "faith cure" may do for a diseased mind, but a little ginger and brandy will beat it in a case of summer colic. Pauper immigration from across the Rio Grande is no more desirable than pauper immigrants landing in New York. The LIGHT'S Mergenthalers may tackle a little German occasionally, but we will be very careful in feeding them anything like Aunt Ruth. It is better to be born lucky then "purty." If John O'Connor gets into the senatorial race this fall the "purty" fellows had better look out. Our proof-reader is a little "rusty" in Latin. The church brethren will please copy their Latin quotations correctly for their Sunday notices. In the eyes of the law the coon crap shooter is the equal of the high-toned poker player, and they should both be treated with the same consideration. "Upon the Paris stage, they say, Burlesque is thought just right; At least, in nearly every play There's a 'take-off' every night." -Town Topics. Whenever you hear any particular young woman run down any particular man on all occasions there's a case of sour grapes. She wanted him but couldn't land him. The colored folks of Kansas City have organized a new secret society, called "The Independent Order of the Sons and Daughters of Jerusalem." During the waterworks election one of the challengers asked an Indian who he was voting for, when he readily replied: "Josey Casiany." Another one answered: "Thady Smithey." If some of the democratic boodle spent in the last campaign had been used in buying up Maverick bank certificates of deposit, there would have been something to show for the money after it was all over. It is understood that Perry Lewis will not be made the purchasing agent for the democratic congressional candidate this year. He will have his own hands full keeping up with Statesman O'Connor. Likes the "Maywood."